Domesticate Him - Domestic Bliss

Does he leave socks on the floor? When guests come for dinner is he as much help as your newborn child? Stop worrying, read on and learn how to achieve domestic bliss.

Men and women have been helping each other for many moons now, however housework has been the bone of contention for most households as far as equality goes. When this point is raised, he generally retorts, "I do most of the cooking." But it's unlikely he does the washing up or indeed picks up his own socks.

Explain it to him

His mother probably cleaned up after him; therefore it will be second nature that you do the same. The thing is unless you actually tell him how much you do he probably won't know, or he won't care. Yes he might vac the living room, empty the internal bin and occasionally empty the dishwasher, but does he know how the toilet rolls reappear and indeed that the toilet does not smell for a reason and why there is never a tide line around the bath? He either genuinely does not realise or he is pretending he is oblivious.

Explain to him that he is not pulling his weight. Do it calmly though, a man hates being told he is lazy. His macho ego does not want to be bruised. Most decent men will understand and hopefully take heed. If nothing changes try one of two things:

1) Stop doing the little things and wait for him to notice, then re-explain. Failing that - leave him (only joking).

2) Write to wife swap and see how he likes living with a lazy scruffy cow for two weeks.

Write it down

Each of you write a list of all the household jobs you do. You will probably be surprised at how much both of you do. Stop thinking he does nothing, you're being naughty now! There is DIY, taking the kids to football, repairs, cooking etc. Whatever the outcome, you will both be reading off the same hymn sheet. The next step is to allocate and identify specific jobs for each other; starting with the ones you donÕt mind doing. When you get to the nasty ones draw up a rota so that he does it one week and you the next. But do weeks by dates otherwise arguments may follow e.g.

"I did it last week," when you know perfectly well you did. Put the rota in a prominent place, so both of you can see exactly where you are. In time you should be able to take it down and bin it, as it should become the norm for both of you.

Finally agree to check each others work. Do not turn this in to a reason to get one over on each other. Always remember to thank him, remember he is making the big changes here and it can only make your life easier.